Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
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