was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize