i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I can't put those talents on a resume
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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