that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
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