PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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