I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Randomize
