Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
They have beer where we have blood.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
