Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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