i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
organizing the empties. That sober.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
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