Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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