Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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