So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize