I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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