I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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