I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
