We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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