I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
