Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
