Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
