hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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