i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
