so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
PANTIES FOUND
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
