Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
youre lurking in front of me
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize