I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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