if you like me you must not know who I am
I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
