what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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