Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
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