I'm lost and stupid without you.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
