The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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