Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
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