its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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