Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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