your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Randomize
