I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize