Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
