I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
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