There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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