no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
