I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize