im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize