Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I need moral support for this bender
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Couch. On fire.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
