just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
