no, he came in my armpit
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Even my vagina gasped.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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