He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
