look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
it glows. i had to have it.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
