Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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