no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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