so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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