She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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