Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
