Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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