he wants to bone in the snuggie
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
