If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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